The Unclad Soul

There is a poignant scene in the British crime-drama, Broadchurch, where Cath, a woman in a dying marriage, confides in a friend. Cath has just discovered that her husband, Jim, had a brief affair with her best friend, Trish. It was Trish who told Cath about the affair. She explained that her long separation from her husband had left her terribly lonely, that she felt unattractive, and missed affection and intimacy, and that in a moment of vulnerability, she violated her best friend’s trust. Cath was furious about the betrayal, and then profoundly saddened by it. It was then that she told her boss and friend, Ed, about the whole thing. In a moment of reflection, she said, “I just thought my life would be, that I’d love someone, and they’d love me back, and it would last my whole life. Why is that so much to ask?” That comment describes the frustration and sorrow in so many marriages today. Society, the Church, our parents, do not prepare us for the difficulties of a lifel...

There is an insightful comment from the novelist Virginia Woolf in her search for purpose in life. She had often come to detours and dead ends. There were high moments of discovery and low times of nagging self-doubt. In a personal essay she concluded, “What is the meaning of life? That was all—a simple question; one that tended to close in on one with the years. The great revelation had never come. The great revelation perhaps never did come. Instead, there were little daily miracles, illuminations, matches struck unexpectedly in the dark.” It is such a magnificent comment. Most of us at some point in our lives, often in mid-life or our later years, look back over it all and wonder what any of it meant. We see people we loved for the wrong reasons. Relationships that ended badly. Pathways we should have never taken. Choices we knew were questionable but made them anyway often with regret. We see good times, laughter and celebrations, deep love; that fun concert, the hila...

Parenting is one of the fantastic experiences of life. Of course, it comes with some of the most exasperating experiences as well. Jerry Seinfeld has said, “Having a two-year-old is like owning a blender you don’t have the top for.” So true. Not everyone can be a parent, and some people simply choose not to have children. I have friends like that and they are perfectly wonderful people and have fulfilling lives. Most of them do have pets, though! I always wanted children. Maybe it had something to do with how I was loved as a child. I’m not sure. But thankfully, I have two beautiful sons, both grown now with their own families. I adore all of them—my sons, their wives, and their children. They also have pets, too, which I also love. I suppose like many people, when my wife and I divorced, our home was deeply disrupted. My divorce affected my career, my friends, but worst of all, it caused a lot of sorrow and confusion for my sons. My oldest was 15. My youngest 13. Crit...

It is easy to exaggerate our current gloom. Especially when it plays out in front of us each day across the myriad of media outlets. Things are bad, yes. Our culture is fraught with disdain, disregard, and the dismissal of rules, standards, and traditions. We are a spoiled society, for the most part, lost in our feelings of entitlement and selfishness, our stubborn beliefs and our unwillingness to revere all humanity, even our own. That, of course, is not the whole story. We do have our better moments, our acts of heroism, our generosity, our compassion, our love. There are vast places across this bleeding nation that are filled with decency, neighborliness, kind words, and good deeds. Not everyone is a bully or a liar, a manipulator or abuser. The country is populated with, yes, saints and angels, people of spiritual and emotional depth, thinking people, noble people who lift, who inspire, who instruct the rest of us in a way of life that doesn’t dominate but cultivates. ...

In a Peanuts cartoon Lucy, Linus, and Charlie Brown are resting on the lawn one afternoon looking at the clouds.  Lucy speaks: “Aren't the clouds beautiful? They look like big balls of cotton. I could just lie here all day, and watch them drift by.  If you use your imagination, you can see lots of things in the cloud formations. What do you think you see, Linus?" "Well, those clouds up there look like the map of the British Honduras on the Caribbean... that cloud up there looks a little like the profile of Thomas Eakins, the famous painter and sculptor...and that group of clouds over there gives me the impression of the stoning of Stephen...I can see the apostle Paul standing there to one side." "Uh huh. That's very good. What do you see in the clouds, Charlie Brown?" "Well, I was going to say I saw a ducky and a horsy, but I changed my mind!”   I’m with Charlie Brown today.  I’m looking for the simple things in life.  Most of everythi...